I was, once again humbled beyond words by the God we serve. Or more to the point, He humbles me to the point I have to share the words. First, I want to live my faith the way my friends at my children's school have shown me that they live theirs. Oh what an amazing story I have to share! I have told it out loud three times today, and after the first time Annie said, "Mom, are you going to cry when you tell everyone?!" LOL! YES! I am!
The backstory: last week on Monday, Middle Son and his next oldest brother started at the charter school where younger daughter and the two youngest sons attend. It is a bilingual ASL/English school that was founded for Deaf kids and families with Deaf parents or siblings. It is very small, about 110 kids in PreK through 12th grade. It is not a "Christian School" but is a school full of strong Christians. Middle Son was NOT happy about leaving homeschooling, but Super Daddy and I both felt VERY certain this was what we were being led to do. This particular son has some extreme (I would say PTSD, or very close) anxiety about school settings based on all of the horrible issues at his last brick and mortar school here in the area (bullying was extreme, apathy on the part of the teachers and admin and bus driver to the bullying, etc), and he has never done transitions well, so we anticipated a rough start. Well, last week he had a horrid week-cried, raged, angry, sad, anxiety ridden, and just plain not happy. His teacher, our vice principal (both friends of mine), youngest daughter and youngest son's teacher from last year (also a friend), as well as Super Daddy and I, were all praying for his anxiety to lessen, for him to feel safe, and for his heart to open to the learning and love the school represents. It was a ROUGH week. He and the vp bonded. A lot. Like three times a day, a lot. She and I both were committed to riding it out, reassuring him, and doing what it took to make sure he knew he was safe there and that people truly CARED how he would feel about any given situation.
This week: Starting on Sunday evening (after some anxiety about it Sunday morning/early afternoon), his mood lightened, he was eager to go to school, was excited about learning again, and just had a weight lifted off of his shoulders. I said prayers of thanksgiving and sent him off to school Monday morning with a fear that I would be receiving a phone call by noon. Monday passed with a GREAT end of day report. Tuesday was a repeat of Monday. Today when I got to school to pick them up, I ran into Jacob's teacher in the hallway. She said, hey, I have a story to tell you about Sunday afternoon. What I heard blessed me and moved me to tears, and I think it is well worth repeating to anyone who will hear.
Sunday afternoon: Our beloved teacher and friend gathered seven friends and her 17 yr old daughter. They met at the school. When they arrived, her daughter began playing her guitar, and they all began singing and praising Jesus. They prayed for my middle son, for him to be set free of this fear and to begin to love learning the way he use to. They prayed for a spirit of joy for him, and that he would have a desire to cooperate, to learn, and a spirit of respect for himself, his teachers, and the rest of the people in his life-school and home. They marched around that school seven times, singing and praising until our friend's daughters fingers bled from playing those metal strings in the cold for so long, and yet she kept playing. They kept marching and proclaiming God's victory over the entire situation until that school had been surrounded by HIM, until they had marched seven times, until they had done what they believed God had called them there to do. Most of these people have never met me, never met my son, but all were willing to go where they could serve God to bless a child who was hurting. Ladies, THIS is the faith I want to live. THIS is the love of Jesus I want my children to see, to live, to learn. God is good always, but never have I been so blessed.
I have no idea what God is preparing us for in this family, but He has our attention. Between the missionary preacher who knocked on my door last week to pray with me when he had NO idea why God was sending him to our door and this amazing story, HE HAS MY ATTENTION. I don't know why God has sent such concrete evidence of His love for our family, but all I can say is YES LORD, I AM LISTENING...SEND ME.
I don't think He is physically sending me any where, but I think that sharing these amazing blessings as they happen is definitely what I am suppose to be doing. So this is the miracle God has performed in my house this week. It may not seem a miracle to anyone else, but to us, it truly has been one.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Another month and more happenings
So much this month...always so much! Where to start? I guess with today and we can work backwards.
Today is a bad pain day, but it was a glorious day in so many ways. I had a lovely lunch with my friend Maria, whom I haven't seen in ages. We visited for over an hour, had wonderful Mexican food, and got to catch up on the comings and goings of our families over the last few months. What a blessing! After lunch, I ran to the kids' school to pick them up, and had one of the single coolest stories EVER shared with me (and it was about one of MY kiddos, our friends and teachers who are living their faith in a very real way. Ran to the other school to get eldest son, then home for a round of homework, a few showers, then off to drop the boys at church for youth group. Super Daddy and I had dinner out with Miss Beautiful younger daughter, then off to church to get the boys. Home again, more showers, more homework, and tired kids tucked in safe and sound for the night. Super Daddy is snoozing. I am up, hurting, and waiting for sleep. Until then, I am choosing to blog about the happenings in our household this month, the blessings and answers to prayer, and servants who followed God to bring me to Him when I needed him most. I have not been so humbled in a long time. WHAT A MIRACLE AND BLESSING!
I'll get to those two stories separately in a minute, or maybe tomorrow if I can get sleep tonight, but some scares, blessings, and questions from this month:
Today is a bad pain day, but it was a glorious day in so many ways. I had a lovely lunch with my friend Maria, whom I haven't seen in ages. We visited for over an hour, had wonderful Mexican food, and got to catch up on the comings and goings of our families over the last few months. What a blessing! After lunch, I ran to the kids' school to pick them up, and had one of the single coolest stories EVER shared with me (and it was about one of MY kiddos, our friends and teachers who are living their faith in a very real way. Ran to the other school to get eldest son, then home for a round of homework, a few showers, then off to drop the boys at church for youth group. Super Daddy and I had dinner out with Miss Beautiful younger daughter, then off to church to get the boys. Home again, more showers, more homework, and tired kids tucked in safe and sound for the night. Super Daddy is snoozing. I am up, hurting, and waiting for sleep. Until then, I am choosing to blog about the happenings in our household this month, the blessings and answers to prayer, and servants who followed God to bring me to Him when I needed him most. I have not been so humbled in a long time. WHAT A MIRACLE AND BLESSING!
I'll get to those two stories separately in a minute, or maybe tomorrow if I can get sleep tonight, but some scares, blessings, and questions from this month:
- my best friend of 25+ years had a scare with spots on her mammogram (God is good...it is all clear)
- my rheumatoid arthritis panel (bloodwork) that I had taken the last week of December finally came back. Turns out that they think the pain is so crummy because in addition to fibromyalgia, I may have lupus too. At least, that is the working diagnosis based on the RA panel. The markers that would indicate lupus are high, evidentally. Next step-see the Rheumatologist.
- we have had two weeks of pass the gastro-intestinal bug around
- more rain than sun and lots of cold for the last two weeks
- a missionary who ended up on my doorstep for the sole purpose of praying for my friend (see above) and I. Really. This is one of the stories I'll write about separately.
- seven women-some I've never met before-and a young lady of 17 years old living their faith in a most amazing and loving way to bring about miracle-the other story I will write about separately.
- new birth certificates, social security cards, and other bits and pieces of things arriving in the mail to prove that our adoptions from December are REAL! :)
- our friend's young adopted daughter will be entering "feeding" therapy at the local children's hospital on Monday, February 9th. Miss Smiley Face has only been home from the other side of the world for a brief time, so we are all praising that Mama will be able to attend this month or so of sleep overs at the hospital with her so her bonding and attaching is not interrupted. Also praising that Daddy is able to take FMLA to be with their adorable sons during this time.
- my friend who is dealing with her own pain and uncertainty related to her MS.
- for the doc to get me in to see the Rheumatologist asap and for us to have clarity on what is causing this pain (so we can get with a treatment plan already!)
- for the great works I see moving in my kids to continue.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
And yet another month gone...and so many changes
How do you mamas do it? How do you manage to blog and share, yet have time for all that you are called to do? I don't understand how it happens.
In the last month we have: been blessed beyond measure with bringing our son home again from Florida (this time for good!), finalized our beloved oldest daughter's adoption, Super Daddy was able to step parent adopt younger daughter and youngest son, we celebrated Christmas-complete with snow on the ground Christmas eve and Christmas morn, I interpreted my first church service (and decided I REALLY need more practice and a broader vocabulary before I do it again!), and enjoyed almost three weeks home together without school (and ten days of that without Super Daddy having to leave for work). What an amazing and blessed month!!!
Second to youngest son is home again...for good. How to share this story and do justice to just how God has moved in it? Hmm...I'll just do my best. About a year ago, an acquaintance-who has now become a truly treasured friend-and I set about praying with our husbands about our family doing respite for their oldest son (at that time 9, nearly 10). At the time, Super Daddy and I were committed to doing whatever this child and his adoptive family needed to help them all heal. Initially we all thought that our family's role would be that of respite family and encouragers. None of us wanted to see the adoption disrupt, even to us, if at all possible. He was adopted from China six years ago by an amazing Christian family who stepped out in faith, even knowing that he had a what some would consider a handicap. Second oldest son is deaf. He was given cochlear implants as quickly as possible once he returned to the US with his first adoptive family. They worked tirelessly to provide him with every opportunity to succeed educationally. His first adoptive family stepped out in faith to bring him home, to care for him with love, and were also able to step out in faith further when they felt they were no longer able to successfully meet all of his needs while meeting the needs of their other children. What a terrifying and sad place they must have been to know that in all of the gifts they have been given by God as parents, that parenting a child with attachment difficulties wasn't one of their gifts. What an amazing faith they showed to say "God, I see you have not given us this gift, please show us what role we are to have in his life. Please lead us where YOU want us to be to give this child what he needs in the body of Christ, even if that isn't our home."
Many people believe, I think inaccurately, that families who choose to relinquish a child or to disrupt an adoption do so out of selfish feelings or fear. Yes, some are afraid, and some do disrupt for selfish reasons, but in my experience most disruptions come from a deep love for the child and a desire to see his or her needs met in ways the original adoptive family simply can not. In our case, for example, our son is second oldest of seven children, but is physically smaller and one grade behind our youngest son. In his previous family (the one who was brave enough to step out to bring him home from China-something Super Daddy and I have never felt called to do, by the way) he was the oldest son, and the middle child. He was also the only deaf child. In our family he has an older Deaf (physically and culturally Deaf) sister, a younger brother with auditory processing disorder, and a house full of people who know ASL. Both families are loving, family oriented, Christian homes. Both families have professional fathers with great educations and mothers who, while they stay home, have good educations themselves. Both families have similar statements of faith, parallel views on education, and a desire to put family first. I say all of this to say that, in our disruption adoption, neither family was "bad," "better," "worse," "unfit," or thought this child was "disposible" (all things I have heard from people unfamiliar with disruptions, attachment disorder, second adoptions-not necessarily about ours, but in general). Both families are loving Christian homes who have different gifts, different skill sets, different needs and abilities. Both have one thing in common though-we have been abundantly blessed by this disruption and the upcoming adoption of this sweet boy by our family. We have formed, in a sometimes awkward but always transparent way, a larger family. We have formed a community where each family prays for the other on days of stress or need, where the mamas can call one another and share those "Can you believe this?!" moments, where the kids can say "yes, I've been there and it is HARD!" and truly understand one another, and where our wonderful son can hear-or see- and have affirmed that he is loved by so many people. His birth mom loved him enough to make sure he was found where he would be cared for in an orphanage in China rather than abandoning him in a countryside somewhere to die. His first family here loved him enough to do all they knew to do to encourage his education, his ability to communicate in both the hearing and Deaf worlds, and to help him to know Christ. His new family loves him enough to say "you are worth every tear, every battle, every moment good or bad", to help him to learn more ASL and to encourage him to continue with his speech therapy in English, and to continue educating him not only with "school" but in Christian discipleship.
We are all adopted into God's family, and by that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. Our earthly family has just gotten a little larger by welcoming this smiling child into our home-not by one child, but by one child and all of the family who has loved him before.
I've gotten off track, and not touched on some of the other amazing things that have happened over the last month, but those can wait for another day. Few things have meant as much to me, or been as full of the Spirit, as bringing our son home. For about half the year last year, this amazing piece of our hearts lived with his other family. We loved them through their daily joys and trials, just as they love us through ours. We missed him terribly while he was gone, and truly never dreamed he would be back in our home. During that time we never once thought "we could do xyz better" we only prayed that we could support them and this sweet boy in all things. We prayed, as they did, for God's will in the entire situation. After a season of missing him in our home, and a season of trying and learning in theirs, we all decided his needs would be best met here. I lovingly call my husband Super Daddy, because in the eyes of his family that is truly his spirit.
In practice, however, he is no more super than I...we are just two parents who love our children, each other, and God who want to do our best for all of those. I am grateful every day that He has given me not only my family, but the amazing support system that I have been given-God Himself, my children's school, our church, the families of my children-some birth families or other first families, and the best case manager in the world. All of these people are needed in our "village" and without them, we would be stumbling in the dark.
In the last month we have: been blessed beyond measure with bringing our son home again from Florida (this time for good!), finalized our beloved oldest daughter's adoption, Super Daddy was able to step parent adopt younger daughter and youngest son, we celebrated Christmas-complete with snow on the ground Christmas eve and Christmas morn, I interpreted my first church service (and decided I REALLY need more practice and a broader vocabulary before I do it again!), and enjoyed almost three weeks home together without school (and ten days of that without Super Daddy having to leave for work). What an amazing and blessed month!!!
Second to youngest son is home again...for good. How to share this story and do justice to just how God has moved in it? Hmm...I'll just do my best. About a year ago, an acquaintance-who has now become a truly treasured friend-and I set about praying with our husbands about our family doing respite for their oldest son (at that time 9, nearly 10). At the time, Super Daddy and I were committed to doing whatever this child and his adoptive family needed to help them all heal. Initially we all thought that our family's role would be that of respite family and encouragers. None of us wanted to see the adoption disrupt, even to us, if at all possible. He was adopted from China six years ago by an amazing Christian family who stepped out in faith, even knowing that he had a what some would consider a handicap. Second oldest son is deaf. He was given cochlear implants as quickly as possible once he returned to the US with his first adoptive family. They worked tirelessly to provide him with every opportunity to succeed educationally. His first adoptive family stepped out in faith to bring him home, to care for him with love, and were also able to step out in faith further when they felt they were no longer able to successfully meet all of his needs while meeting the needs of their other children. What a terrifying and sad place they must have been to know that in all of the gifts they have been given by God as parents, that parenting a child with attachment difficulties wasn't one of their gifts. What an amazing faith they showed to say "God, I see you have not given us this gift, please show us what role we are to have in his life. Please lead us where YOU want us to be to give this child what he needs in the body of Christ, even if that isn't our home."
Many people believe, I think inaccurately, that families who choose to relinquish a child or to disrupt an adoption do so out of selfish feelings or fear. Yes, some are afraid, and some do disrupt for selfish reasons, but in my experience most disruptions come from a deep love for the child and a desire to see his or her needs met in ways the original adoptive family simply can not. In our case, for example, our son is second oldest of seven children, but is physically smaller and one grade behind our youngest son. In his previous family (the one who was brave enough to step out to bring him home from China-something Super Daddy and I have never felt called to do, by the way) he was the oldest son, and the middle child. He was also the only deaf child. In our family he has an older Deaf (physically and culturally Deaf) sister, a younger brother with auditory processing disorder, and a house full of people who know ASL. Both families are loving, family oriented, Christian homes. Both families have professional fathers with great educations and mothers who, while they stay home, have good educations themselves. Both families have similar statements of faith, parallel views on education, and a desire to put family first. I say all of this to say that, in our disruption adoption, neither family was "bad," "better," "worse," "unfit," or thought this child was "disposible" (all things I have heard from people unfamiliar with disruptions, attachment disorder, second adoptions-not necessarily about ours, but in general). Both families are loving Christian homes who have different gifts, different skill sets, different needs and abilities. Both have one thing in common though-we have been abundantly blessed by this disruption and the upcoming adoption of this sweet boy by our family. We have formed, in a sometimes awkward but always transparent way, a larger family. We have formed a community where each family prays for the other on days of stress or need, where the mamas can call one another and share those "Can you believe this?!" moments, where the kids can say "yes, I've been there and it is HARD!" and truly understand one another, and where our wonderful son can hear-or see- and have affirmed that he is loved by so many people. His birth mom loved him enough to make sure he was found where he would be cared for in an orphanage in China rather than abandoning him in a countryside somewhere to die. His first family here loved him enough to do all they knew to do to encourage his education, his ability to communicate in both the hearing and Deaf worlds, and to help him to know Christ. His new family loves him enough to say "you are worth every tear, every battle, every moment good or bad", to help him to learn more ASL and to encourage him to continue with his speech therapy in English, and to continue educating him not only with "school" but in Christian discipleship.
We are all adopted into God's family, and by that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. Our earthly family has just gotten a little larger by welcoming this smiling child into our home-not by one child, but by one child and all of the family who has loved him before.
I've gotten off track, and not touched on some of the other amazing things that have happened over the last month, but those can wait for another day. Few things have meant as much to me, or been as full of the Spirit, as bringing our son home. For about half the year last year, this amazing piece of our hearts lived with his other family. We loved them through their daily joys and trials, just as they love us through ours. We missed him terribly while he was gone, and truly never dreamed he would be back in our home. During that time we never once thought "we could do xyz better" we only prayed that we could support them and this sweet boy in all things. We prayed, as they did, for God's will in the entire situation. After a season of missing him in our home, and a season of trying and learning in theirs, we all decided his needs would be best met here. I lovingly call my husband Super Daddy, because in the eyes of his family that is truly his spirit.
In practice, however, he is no more super than I...we are just two parents who love our children, each other, and God who want to do our best for all of those. I am grateful every day that He has given me not only my family, but the amazing support system that I have been given-God Himself, my children's school, our church, the families of my children-some birth families or other first families, and the best case manager in the world. All of these people are needed in our "village" and without them, we would be stumbling in the dark.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Progress...maybe
So I saw the doctor on Monday morning. You know, the one who is firmly convinced if I would just lose weight that I would be the picture of health? That one. Anyway...she still isn't convinced that the two other doctors who have diagnosed me with fibromyalgia are right, but at least she has gotten off the weight loss jag. For this I am thankful. I know I'm fat. This is not a surprise to me, but I am still trying to balance how to lose weight when any exercise AT ALL makes me hurt so bad I can hardly function for the next two days. But I digress...the doc has ordered multiple blood work ups to check for various issues including Rheumatoid arthritis, and just for the annual cholesterol, blood sugar, etc that goes with a physical. She has also ordered xrays of the areas that are causing me the most pain to see if there is arthritis present or some other issue. Blood work is done, xrays are going to have to happen tomorrow morning or Friday.
Progress on other fronts...I found a table on craigslist that was both within our price range (which is to say CHEAP) and large enough to seat our ever growing family. My parents and I are taking a trek to Dallas to pick it up in about half an hour. I'm delighted. The older, and smaller, table is going in the area where I do my scrapbooking and other crafts. I'm tickled pink to have a larger area to work with, especially since I have quite a few projects in the works. I have Alexia and Kyle's wedding scrapbook, Courtnee's scrapbook for her son Anthony who was only with her for such a short period of time, and a few things I want to get done for family members. I also have to box up and ship out some ornaments to a friend, Christmas cards, and Christmas presents. So...progress is being made.
Now it is time to make progress with getting a shower! :D
Progress on other fronts...I found a table on craigslist that was both within our price range (which is to say CHEAP) and large enough to seat our ever growing family. My parents and I are taking a trek to Dallas to pick it up in about half an hour. I'm delighted. The older, and smaller, table is going in the area where I do my scrapbooking and other crafts. I'm tickled pink to have a larger area to work with, especially since I have quite a few projects in the works. I have Alexia and Kyle's wedding scrapbook, Courtnee's scrapbook for her son Anthony who was only with her for such a short period of time, and a few things I want to get done for family members. I also have to box up and ship out some ornaments to a friend, Christmas cards, and Christmas presents. So...progress is being made.
Now it is time to make progress with getting a shower! :D
Thursday, November 26, 2009
So Many Things to be Thankful for...
...and yet I feel sad today. Today I am missing my Granny, the kids' great Grandma Jet, and my oldest daughter, Christina and her son, Kevin. I am remarkably melancholy and hollow feeling today, and I don't know why. I am so blessed-blessed in ways I can't begin to explain, and today of all days should be the source of joy and happiness not sadness and stress.
Today is our fourth anniversary, and I am married to the most remarkable man on earth. Super Daddy is my best friend, my partner in all ways, and my rock. This brings me more joy than I can say, and I feel guilty that this alone isn't enough to lighten my mood today.
I think the biggest problem I am having today is that I am having a ridiculous amount of pain today, and have been for the last few days. Okay, fibromyalgia stinks, and there is always some degree of pain, but truly it is usually bearable. The last few days, it has been all I can do to do the things I HAVE to get done, and any thing extra has not been an option. I hate this feeling. I hate not being able to complete stupid and simple tasks that should not be beyond me. I am angry at this stupid disease. I'm angry that I had to deal with 25 years of pain and infertility crap, and now it seems I get to spend the rest of my life with this pain. I *know* I need to find my solace in God. I truly WANT to do this. I just don't know how to be thankful for this pain. I know I have it for a reason, but what that reason might be, I could not begin to guess. All I know is that I need to find a way to let go of this anger, and deal with the pain, because it is interfering with my life.
Today is our fourth anniversary, and I am married to the most remarkable man on earth. Super Daddy is my best friend, my partner in all ways, and my rock. This brings me more joy than I can say, and I feel guilty that this alone isn't enough to lighten my mood today.
I think the biggest problem I am having today is that I am having a ridiculous amount of pain today, and have been for the last few days. Okay, fibromyalgia stinks, and there is always some degree of pain, but truly it is usually bearable. The last few days, it has been all I can do to do the things I HAVE to get done, and any thing extra has not been an option. I hate this feeling. I hate not being able to complete stupid and simple tasks that should not be beyond me. I am angry at this stupid disease. I'm angry that I had to deal with 25 years of pain and infertility crap, and now it seems I get to spend the rest of my life with this pain. I *know* I need to find my solace in God. I truly WANT to do this. I just don't know how to be thankful for this pain. I know I have it for a reason, but what that reason might be, I could not begin to guess. All I know is that I need to find a way to let go of this anger, and deal with the pain, because it is interfering with my life.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Wow...and who would have dreamed...
that in two days things could change so much. Last week we got a call on Wednesday night that my oldest son, who is sixteen and had previously been living with my exhusband in another state, would be coming to our house to live until he becomes an adult. Our Thursday and Friday were spent running around like a loon, buying the things needed to move him in, move a few of the other kids around into different rooms to accommodate him coming, painting rooms, picking up things, taking people to the airport, picking people up...oh what a lot to do in just that short period of time. In those two days, I was blessed more abundantly than I could have imagined by so many people: my sons' dad who paid for all of the "stuff" needed to get the house physically ready, friends who helped paint until the wee hours of the night and built and unbuilt bunk beds, dressers, and other furniture, for case managers who plowed forward to make sure our paperwork was in order, for a husband who says "yes Lord" when asked to stretch himself farther than he thought he could before, and for children who eagerly and respectfully welcomed their brother home. Blessings everywhere in this life change. Oh, and possibly the biggest blessing of all: a sixteen year old boy who was able to say "Thanks for all you did in such a short period of time to make sure my room was ready for me to come live with you." From a kid on the attachment disorder spectrum, this was HUGE. Heck for a normal sixteen year old boy this was huge.
The end of the week last week/beginning of this week has looked like this:
Wednesday evening-find out B was coming to live with us
Thursday-Super Daddy flies to S. Texas to see his Grandpa, who was receiving hospice care while living at SD's mom's house; The Mama spent all day running for supplies, painting, and thanking God for the friends who stepped up and did more than I could have imagined. Very late, like nearly midnight, SD's plane arrives back in the DFW area and he comes home.
Friday-Super Daddy has a GRE prep class, because apparently his possession of a master degree from a prominent university is not proof enough that he can perform on a graduate level at this same university (He is in their PhD program in the same department and major). The Mama spends time prepping, picking up a bed, dropping off her sister in law The Marine at the airport to visit the same Grandpa, talking to SD's mom to give condolenscences as it sounds like Grandpa may not make it through the night. Picked up eldest son, B, from the airport. Victory! He likes the room we worked so hard on!
Saturday-Ah, Halloween. We had a "Trunk or Treat" event at our church which I wisely volunteered us all for months ago. SD had his second study class for the GRE, I hung with six very wound for sound kiddos. Literally 30 minutes before we were to be at the church, we got the call that Grandpa had passed. After a little snuggling, we decided to go to the party anyway. Cute kids in costumes can cure a lot of sadness, let me tell you!
Sunday-Super Daddy and younger daughter, Miss Diva, headed to see the horsies early, so as to make it to church on time. Then church. I was both disappointed and glad that we did not list off all of the Saints who had gone before us as we usually do. I am still very much grieving my Granny, and I am certain that I would not have been able to make it through that if we had, nor would SD, having just lost his Grandpa the day before. After church we drove SD to the airport so he could go on a two week business trip to the Middle East-never fear, he is in an ally nation, not a war zone.
Monday-spent the day running around to get B ready for school-applying for a new social security card, talking to the school, doing tuns of laundry, and a few other miscellaneous odds and ends. Spent some time watching a very silly BBC video on youtube with B. Discovered that Miss Linda's White Chili was a huge hit. Yay for cheap and easy food! :D Dry beans are becoming one of my favorite staples. You have to plan ahead, but they are cheap and feed an army.
So, dear reader, this is what you have missed in the last few days at our house. Oh...and the part I forgot...during that beginning of this time we were blessed with new friends who are about to bring their little son home (their first adoption and their first child...how does it get better?!). Our case manager, who by the way is in my eyes CaseManagerOfTheYear, asked us if our new friends could shadow our "more experienced" family for a few days to gain some practical training. Little did we, or they, know what they were getting into when we all agreed to this adventure! :D We were blessed abundantly with amazing new friends, who not only came to observe for their own training but pitched in and did anything and everything needed to make sure our son came home to a finished room (minus the flower fan being replaced...we will get to that later! LOL). I figure if those few days didn't scare them out of wanting to have children, nothing will. ;)
Super Daddy is always greatly missed by The Mama and the kids while he is gone on a business trip, but sometimes that homesickness just multiplies and takes on a life of its own. Little Man and Middle Son are both adjusting to SD being gone and B coming within days of one another. They have pulled out some pretty amazing stops and had some pretty horrid tantrums (mostly yesterday) but seem to have recovered now. Hallalujah. One of the things that The Mama can take for granted-though never intentionally-are the amazing tasks that Super Daddy undertakes daily to make sure the household runs smoothly, such as getting up at an unholy hour (at least to his night walking spouse), making sure The Diva gets her protein bar or something with enough protein to keep her sugar up and level for a while (thus ensuring a reasonable attitude, or at least a better one), and delivering Little Man and The Diva to school by 745 AM each morning. I am truly blessed. Maybe those things don't seem like big things to you, but to me they are monumental. They remind me daily that the head of our house is willing and able to do whatever is needed to love his family and that he sees us as worth the effort to stretch himself in the ways that show that to us.
I am tired and need to sleep. I have the song "Take My Hand, Precious Lord" stuck in my head. I have been singing it and signing it all day for two days. Anyone who knows me well can find the irony in that. I *love* that hymn, but it makes me cry each and every time I sing it, hear it, sign it, think about it. It has always effected me that way, same as "Amazing Grace" and "In the Garden" and "The Old Rugged Cross". They all remind me of my Granny, and did long before we sang them at her funeral. The other song we used for her funeral was Mercy Me's "I Can Only Imagine"-another one that makes me tear up. There are some things that make me tear up because they remind me of someone or something special, some things that are so amazing that I can't help but cry, and then sometimes it is just a day ending in "y". Before I get off on a complete tangent of songs that renew my spirit and remind me why I have faith in a God who died to the world so long ago, I am off to sleep. I will try to find the words to explain that one day, but today...time to sleep.
The end of the week last week/beginning of this week has looked like this:
Wednesday evening-find out B was coming to live with us
Thursday-Super Daddy flies to S. Texas to see his Grandpa, who was receiving hospice care while living at SD's mom's house; The Mama spent all day running for supplies, painting, and thanking God for the friends who stepped up and did more than I could have imagined. Very late, like nearly midnight, SD's plane arrives back in the DFW area and he comes home.
Friday-Super Daddy has a GRE prep class, because apparently his possession of a master degree from a prominent university is not proof enough that he can perform on a graduate level at this same university (He is in their PhD program in the same department and major). The Mama spends time prepping, picking up a bed, dropping off her sister in law The Marine at the airport to visit the same Grandpa, talking to SD's mom to give condolenscences as it sounds like Grandpa may not make it through the night. Picked up eldest son, B, from the airport. Victory! He likes the room we worked so hard on!
Saturday-Ah, Halloween. We had a "Trunk or Treat" event at our church which I wisely volunteered us all for months ago. SD had his second study class for the GRE, I hung with six very wound for sound kiddos. Literally 30 minutes before we were to be at the church, we got the call that Grandpa had passed. After a little snuggling, we decided to go to the party anyway. Cute kids in costumes can cure a lot of sadness, let me tell you!
Sunday-Super Daddy and younger daughter, Miss Diva, headed to see the horsies early, so as to make it to church on time. Then church. I was both disappointed and glad that we did not list off all of the Saints who had gone before us as we usually do. I am still very much grieving my Granny, and I am certain that I would not have been able to make it through that if we had, nor would SD, having just lost his Grandpa the day before. After church we drove SD to the airport so he could go on a two week business trip to the Middle East-never fear, he is in an ally nation, not a war zone.
Monday-spent the day running around to get B ready for school-applying for a new social security card, talking to the school, doing tuns of laundry, and a few other miscellaneous odds and ends. Spent some time watching a very silly BBC video on youtube with B. Discovered that Miss Linda's White Chili was a huge hit. Yay for cheap and easy food! :D Dry beans are becoming one of my favorite staples. You have to plan ahead, but they are cheap and feed an army.
So, dear reader, this is what you have missed in the last few days at our house. Oh...and the part I forgot...during that beginning of this time we were blessed with new friends who are about to bring their little son home (their first adoption and their first child...how does it get better?!). Our case manager, who by the way is in my eyes CaseManagerOfTheYear, asked us if our new friends could shadow our "more experienced" family for a few days to gain some practical training. Little did we, or they, know what they were getting into when we all agreed to this adventure! :D We were blessed abundantly with amazing new friends, who not only came to observe for their own training but pitched in and did anything and everything needed to make sure our son came home to a finished room (minus the flower fan being replaced...we will get to that later! LOL). I figure if those few days didn't scare them out of wanting to have children, nothing will. ;)
Super Daddy is always greatly missed by The Mama and the kids while he is gone on a business trip, but sometimes that homesickness just multiplies and takes on a life of its own. Little Man and Middle Son are both adjusting to SD being gone and B coming within days of one another. They have pulled out some pretty amazing stops and had some pretty horrid tantrums (mostly yesterday) but seem to have recovered now. Hallalujah. One of the things that The Mama can take for granted-though never intentionally-are the amazing tasks that Super Daddy undertakes daily to make sure the household runs smoothly, such as getting up at an unholy hour (at least to his night walking spouse), making sure The Diva gets her protein bar or something with enough protein to keep her sugar up and level for a while (thus ensuring a reasonable attitude, or at least a better one), and delivering Little Man and The Diva to school by 745 AM each morning. I am truly blessed. Maybe those things don't seem like big things to you, but to me they are monumental. They remind me daily that the head of our house is willing and able to do whatever is needed to love his family and that he sees us as worth the effort to stretch himself in the ways that show that to us.
I am tired and need to sleep. I have the song "Take My Hand, Precious Lord" stuck in my head. I have been singing it and signing it all day for two days. Anyone who knows me well can find the irony in that. I *love* that hymn, but it makes me cry each and every time I sing it, hear it, sign it, think about it. It has always effected me that way, same as "Amazing Grace" and "In the Garden" and "The Old Rugged Cross". They all remind me of my Granny, and did long before we sang them at her funeral. The other song we used for her funeral was Mercy Me's "I Can Only Imagine"-another one that makes me tear up. There are some things that make me tear up because they remind me of someone or something special, some things that are so amazing that I can't help but cry, and then sometimes it is just a day ending in "y". Before I get off on a complete tangent of songs that renew my spirit and remind me why I have faith in a God who died to the world so long ago, I am off to sleep. I will try to find the words to explain that one day, but today...time to sleep.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Hmmm A Year Ago, huh?
Well, apparently my idea to blog was a fleeting one. Here we are, nearly a year later, and so much has changed.
When I started this blog it was to keep up with our adventures as a foster/adoptive/respite family for a Christian agency in our area. I thought I would tell our story often, so people could keep up, roll their eyes, or share the good stuff. We have had abundant "good stuff" over the last year, and some bad stuff too, but I have forgotten to write. Maybe it has been less about forgetting to write, and more about not knowing how to put things down in a "safe" way.
Things have changed in such drastic ways. This time last year, my Granny-who was my strongest prayer partner, Jason, and I were praying about a teen girl who had been a "waiting child" in the Texas foster care system for years on end. Should we offer to do respite? Should we consider adopting her? How were we suppose to move forward with this major decision? Would the kids accept her? Were we nuts for even considering a teen, let alone one with "special needs?"
Last March, the day of her parents' wedding anniversary, my Granny died. I have no doubt what so ever that she was welcomed home with the refrain of "well done my good and faithful servent" because never have I known a woman so consumed with love for our Lord nor one who served her family and the world more completely.
In July we brought the girl we had all been praying for home. We were not sure when she came how well everyone would integrate together, but we stepped out in faith to bring her home. I can't begin to express how well it has gone. She is a very easy going, loving, fun girl. She is a great match with the other kiddos in our house. We were a little scared, but very excited when we met her. Our fears were completely unwarranted, because she is an utter joy. :) Some of my hardest moments have had nothing to do with our wonderful daughter, and everything to do with the fact that my Granny didn't get to meet her. :(
You see, we were planning a trip home to Ohio to see my Granny for this past July. It would have been my first trip home since my Grandaddy's funeral, two years ago in July. The week before she died, just days actually, we talked about what kind of jam I would bring her (I make jams each year-she wanted Strawberry, by the way), my crazy bird (we have a rescued European Starling who will talk your ear off if you sit still long enough), and our foster care and adoption journeys.
In that same time my dad has "retired" a year early. That retirement came courtesy of the horrible economy, particularly for construction, in SW Florida. We were blessed to have a very long term respite placement-the son of a very dear family that we have come to love and respect a great deal; Jonathan is a huge blessing in our lives even though he is back home in Florida now. Annie and Christian have had their parental rights terminated and are waiting for Jason's step parent adoption of them to be finalized. We made our last trip to FL as a family to Grandma and Grandpa's Florida house. We lost another beloved great grandmother, Grandma Jet (Jeannette Kinnen). My mom is retiring as of Monday. :)
This year has held a lot of changes. It has required all of us to stretch beyond what we thought was comfortable, but has blessed us abundantly. We have grown. We have cried. We have laughed and rejoiced. Through it all we have tried to keep our faith and love one another. I want to remember the challenges and the blessings as they come, so I will try to stay the course to writing this blog.
When I started this blog it was to keep up with our adventures as a foster/adoptive/respite family for a Christian agency in our area. I thought I would tell our story often, so people could keep up, roll their eyes, or share the good stuff. We have had abundant "good stuff" over the last year, and some bad stuff too, but I have forgotten to write. Maybe it has been less about forgetting to write, and more about not knowing how to put things down in a "safe" way.
Things have changed in such drastic ways. This time last year, my Granny-who was my strongest prayer partner, Jason, and I were praying about a teen girl who had been a "waiting child" in the Texas foster care system for years on end. Should we offer to do respite? Should we consider adopting her? How were we suppose to move forward with this major decision? Would the kids accept her? Were we nuts for even considering a teen, let alone one with "special needs?"
Last March, the day of her parents' wedding anniversary, my Granny died. I have no doubt what so ever that she was welcomed home with the refrain of "well done my good and faithful servent" because never have I known a woman so consumed with love for our Lord nor one who served her family and the world more completely.
In July we brought the girl we had all been praying for home. We were not sure when she came how well everyone would integrate together, but we stepped out in faith to bring her home. I can't begin to express how well it has gone. She is a very easy going, loving, fun girl. She is a great match with the other kiddos in our house. We were a little scared, but very excited when we met her. Our fears were completely unwarranted, because she is an utter joy. :) Some of my hardest moments have had nothing to do with our wonderful daughter, and everything to do with the fact that my Granny didn't get to meet her. :(
You see, we were planning a trip home to Ohio to see my Granny for this past July. It would have been my first trip home since my Grandaddy's funeral, two years ago in July. The week before she died, just days actually, we talked about what kind of jam I would bring her (I make jams each year-she wanted Strawberry, by the way), my crazy bird (we have a rescued European Starling who will talk your ear off if you sit still long enough), and our foster care and adoption journeys.
In that same time my dad has "retired" a year early. That retirement came courtesy of the horrible economy, particularly for construction, in SW Florida. We were blessed to have a very long term respite placement-the son of a very dear family that we have come to love and respect a great deal; Jonathan is a huge blessing in our lives even though he is back home in Florida now. Annie and Christian have had their parental rights terminated and are waiting for Jason's step parent adoption of them to be finalized. We made our last trip to FL as a family to Grandma and Grandpa's Florida house. We lost another beloved great grandmother, Grandma Jet (Jeannette Kinnen). My mom is retiring as of Monday. :)
This year has held a lot of changes. It has required all of us to stretch beyond what we thought was comfortable, but has blessed us abundantly. We have grown. We have cried. We have laughed and rejoiced. Through it all we have tried to keep our faith and love one another. I want to remember the challenges and the blessings as they come, so I will try to stay the course to writing this blog.
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